Sunday, December 6, 2015

Haiku Tag


Flickr creative commons photo by Nimish Gori

faint sounds whispering
oak leaves tumble on west wind
snow is coming

©Mary Lee Hahn, 2015





It's been fun playing haiku tag with Kevin (@dogtrax) on Twitter:

I write. 
I post. 
I Tweet. 

He reads,
then haiku-riffs off my words. 

(Appropriate, since he's a musician as well as a teacher, poet, and tech guru.) 

Kevin's also done some "line lifting" in the past, as a way to keep a poetic conversation going. So I decided to riff today's haiku back to Kevin by borrowing the last line of his haiku from yesterday for the first line of my haiku today.

12 comments:

  1. Today, a tanka. The rules say 5-7-5-7-7, but Japanese tanka tends to be shorter, 20-25 English syllables long. Some that I've read are not even 5 lines I'm trying to do 5 lines, with 3 longer and 2 shorter. Total syllables in the 20-25 range. I like the shortness of that number. Also, I'm trying to get a "hinge" line in there that moves one image to another. This one...not so much on the hinge line. It's more like just hinge punctuation.

    This one is from the news.


    a capsized boat
    in the pounding surf --
    what wise man proclaims
    no room
    for you?

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    Replies
    1. And this begs the question of wisdom//brain vs. compassion/heart...

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    2. Steve- You say so much in so few words. I'm fascinated by your process too. I'm definitely learning a lot from you, Kevin, and Mary Lee. I want to try the two connected images thing. Hmmmmm.

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    3. Hi, Carol,
      This link to a TankaOnline article pretty much sums up my process! Also, there are some superb examples of modern tanka there, in my opinion.

      http://www.tankaonline.com/Quick%20Start%20Guide.htm

      In my notebook, I often start with an image (like the capsized boat that I remember from the news) and then write/explore that image to find out more.

      As I think about it, for me an image usually drives a poem, and a good amount of trust, trust that if I explore an image, I'll begin to understand why it plucked a heart-string. Or, also, trust that if I look closely enough at almost anything, I'll find a striking image!

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  2. Mary Lee,
    What fun to play haiku tag! I love what you did with Kevin's last line, bringing such a clear and concrete image to the faint whispering. Wow!

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  3. Such a serene entry, Mary Lee
    My thought have been interrupted by crazy busyness since Thanksgiving so I appreciate your haiku moments.

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  4. All of you inspire me. I am trying to learn the art of haiku writing. My attempt is at http://beyondliteracylink.blogspot.com/2015/12/celebrating-white-space.html. All critiques are welcomed.

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    Replies
    1. I'm glad you were inspired to join us, Carol!

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  5. Love the tumbling, whispering leaves. Also, the whole haiku tag concept.

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  6. “Frugality”

    Grandma, never wasteful,
    scrapes morsels of dough.
    stamps thimble circles,
    sprinkles cinnamon,
    and bakes a tea party.
    © Carol Wilcox, 2015

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I love your grandma more with each poem you write!

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    2. What a beautifully surprising ending, Carol. I love this image of baking a party. And also the frugal, thoughtfulness the poem is steeped in. What a tribute.

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